In A House That I Built

I am trapped in house that I don’t want to be in.

I built this house.

It is mine.

I needed this house.

I needed to build this house because of before. I created it to look like how I wanted it. Sure it needs just a few more things to fix, but for the most part it is mine. I have a lot of peace because I built the house that I wanted. But, now…now I am ready to leave this house. At least I want to explore what is outside. What is out there. I look out my window and I see so many people outside of my house. Laughing, having fun. They seem like they are enjoying themselves. Surely, they are having some problems maybe a burn or two from flying too close to the sun every once in while. I saw someone fall into a deep hole. I yelled through the window to help them get out of it. You see I am too afraid to leave my home. It is my comfort zone. It is the house that I built. So I can’t leave and help the way that my heart intends. I just look from my window. I look at everyone else when I can. I try not to spend too much time looking for I will get jealous. Jealous…I don’t know if that is quite the right word or the proper emotion. I think I feel left out. Because they are enjoying their freedoms, their bravery, even though they get burnt by the sun. Even though they fall in holes. See me, I really am truly brave. I really am, but I learned not to take too many chances. I can’t risk destroying the house that I built. When I see someone outside alone, I want to be with them. From afar, they seem nice, loving, and cool. And I know for sure they will like to see all of the things that I built. I think they will be proud to see what an industrious woman I am and how I could do so much for myself. I think they will be proud of a woman like me. I open the door…slightly ajar, but not too much because I have a house to protect and really I don’t know them, not like I know the people who flew close to the sun and got burnt or the other one who fell too deeply in the hole. My door is open, I peek with one eye through the slit. The sun burns at first then it gets warm. It is warming and I am excited because I have never really been outside since I built my house. They get closer to the door. Their skin is dark as the night, as white as a bright light, and as warm as a burning candle flame in a dark room. I am ready to be outside with the sun and holes, because they seem good. But when they got close. When they get close, they show their ugly fang-like teeth, their nails, and the whites disappear in their eyes. They are monsters. They are trying to attack the house that I built. As soon as they show me who they are I quickly slam the door. I am panicked, my back is backed up against the door. My heels digging into my ground.I pushing with all my strength to keep the monsters out. I turn, I lock all my locks. I close the all curtains and all the blinds. I sit in the middle of my house where it is safe. On the floor. On my bottom. My knees are close to my chest. My heart pounds. My arms wrapped tightly around my legs. That was a close one. It was too close. How could you be so stupid I whisper to myself. You see I let a few in a few times…Monsters. They destroyed a few rooms in my house. That is what I meant by I needed to fix a few things. I thought they were safe, but they weren’t. I pushed one out. But it keeps clawing at my window and my door. The other seemed good but they could not hold back their true form. So I stopped looking out the window. I just hear them. You know the people who fly too close to the sun and the ones who fall into holes. Maybe I will go outside one day. I hope to leave this house that I built.

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